| Saturday, May 10, 2014 |
| Scared, dazed, and confused. |
| Eight days before I tie the knot. "Sigurado ka na ba?" For the 2nd time, I was asked by my eldest cousin (brother) that. Honestly? I don't know. I'm scared. It's a very unfamiliar path. Like a long dark tunnel where you aren't even sure if there will be a light at the end, if ever there's such a thing as both 'light' and 'end'.
I want to run back and hide at the comfort of our home. My room, my bed, with my family. It's heartbreaking, like I'm saying goodbye. Like a part of me is dying and I can't do anything about it, but cry. And cry. And cry some more. I don't remember the last time I cried this hard. Painful sobs.
I, too, ask myself, "Am I ready for this?" Is this normal, what I'm feeling now? Are these what they call 'Wedding Jitters'?
Lord help me. And grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Amen.
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posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/10/2014 02:39:00 AM  |
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| Wednesday, April 13, 2011 |
| Crappy Day - 12 Apr 2011 |
It all started with my dream. I dreamt of Batanes -- very beautiful indeed. Setting: check! Cast of characters: epic fail. Guess who was there? It was the ex. The Dark Shadow.
When I woke up from my dream, I told myself, I wouldn't forget the details (because lately, that's what happens when I dream). Sleep again. When I finally woke up for real this time, seemed like my mind unconsciously "auto purged" my dream. But I am very clear that the Dark Shadow was in it.
Eureka! It was only tonight, on my way home, alone with my thoughts, when I realized why I was in a crappy mood. Eureka! It wasn't just about the dream. It was the conversation that we had. Replay, rewind. *ouch*
I should get a grip, I know, and get over it. It's done... But until you get a grip on yourself and get over it too... This is how it's gonna be. This is how you'd always make me feel.
Amuse me. Sing for me. I can love you like that. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/13/2011 12:20:00 AM |
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| Sunday, February 06, 2011 |
| Love Is... |
| Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, its hope, and endurance. In a word, there are three things that last forever: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of them all is LOVE. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/06/2011 01:23:00 AM |
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| Thursday, January 20, 2011 |
| 2011 Predictions for the Goat |
The Goat astrological predictions in 2011 rabbit year indicate brighter prospects for the Goat in the Year of the Rabbit. The 2011 Goat horoscope predictions tell us that the 2011 metal rabbit year will be much positive period for those with the Chinese Goat zodiac sign. The fortune for the Goat will greatly improve in the rabbit year 2011 as the Goat will have a much improved feng shui in 2011. The wealth, career and health stars of the Goat will be shining much brighter and bring many pleasing developments in 2011 for the Goat.
The Goat must make the most of the opportunities that are coming their way in this metal rabbit year. The 2011 career star looks very promising for the Goat in the rabbit year. The Goat will benefit a great deal from the support and goodwill of others and a good tip in 2011 for a positive outlook for the Goat is that it would be worth discussing their options with those who are able to advise them. The relationship star for the Goat will be good as it will allow them to widen their social circle and make some good friends. The Goat will have some the busiest social activities during the months of February, April, July and September. Positive developments in the career of the Goat can be seen during the months of March, May, October and November. The 2011 Chinese Goat astrology predictions indicate that as long as the Goat take the initiative in the rabbit year, they will receive many rewards in 2011.
The 1919 Earth Goat or 1979 Earth Goat will have some important developments in some parts of their lives. The Goat 2011 Chinese astrology forecasts an addition to the family or they will become parents in the rabbit year. The Earth Goat will also have some urge to do some renovations to their house. Where relationships are concerned, February, April, July and September will give the Earth Goat some interesting social activities. The 2011 horoscope readings for the Earth Goat predict major success for those whose work is in any way expressive. There will be some rise in income due to promotions at work. The Earth Goat must not miss out on chances to develop their skills in the Year of the Rabbit.
*****
everything's good for me, i just hope the pregnancy won't happen, though
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 1/20/2011 12:41:00 AM |
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| Sana... |
... sinarili ko na lang. Ako pa tuloy ngayon ang masama.
... naisip mo yung mararamdaman ko. Ikaw kaya yung lumagay sa sitwasyon ko, try mo?
... natuturuan ang nararamdaman. Gusto ko bang matakot kung alam kong pwede mo siyang makita dun?
... maging manhid nalang ako. Di sana hindi masakit kahit alam kong siya ang 'greatest love' mo.
Sana... ako nga talaga ang laman ng puso mo, hindi dahil wala lang siya kaya 'sub' muna ako. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 1/20/2011 12:17:00 AM |
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| Saturday, June 05, 2010 |
| Adulthood @ 30 |
I attended my son's nursery orientation this morning. Forms had to be filled up, and one of the infos which I had to provide was the father's name. Left it blank for a while, but eventually, I had to go back to that empty glaring space. I made a decision. This is it. I wrote, "single parent." Big leap, no turning back now.
As simple as that seemed to be, I realized that not only did I decide for myself, I have also decided on the fate of my son. That was it, I've cut the ties. I had to do it for us. And this was triggered by actually... something petty.
During the orientation, students will have to submit pictures of their family for an art project. Father, mother, siblings. What the?! I can't just give 'his' picture for my son to see!!! I am very lucky to have a really smart kid, and unfortunately, this is how his thoughts would sound like: "Okay, so I'm seeing this picture of my supposed father right in front of me, but where is he?!" No false hopes for everyone, especially, and most especially not for a kid!
I used to tell myself that I'll cross the bridge when I get there. Here I am now nearing that bridge. It won't be easy for both of us. How do I explain to him, at 4 years old? How will Gian understand, at 4 years old, that while all of his classmates has fathers, he doesn't? God help me.
Yes, only today, at 30 years old, did I realize that I am an adult. I should play the part.
It was today, that I ate "life-changing decision" for breakfast. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/05/2010 10:16:00 PM |
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| Thursday, May 27, 2010 |
| smile-heart-smile-heart |
Q: inlove ka ba?
A: i wish i am. never felt that for quite some time now :)
... and just like that, i'm drawn. mystified. echoing you, i've never felt like this for quite some time now, too *insert plenty of hearts here*
happy-love! errr... crush pa lang naman. not to be too high-school-y here. yes, i crush you (hahaha i so love this line!) but i'm just gonna enjoy this feeling. no expectations. i don't want to see that 'heart-suddenly-breaks' yahoo smiley emoticon ever again. if it's for me, it's for me. i've learned to deal with that.
but!!! can i just say, i did miss this kind of feeling... *sigh* that's a happy sigh, btw :)
you, you...! you make me smile. you make me sing. you're the spring in my step. you embody everything that's positive. i am alive!
Q: am i inlove?
A: i'd love to, only because it's you :) |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/27/2010 12:57:00 AM |
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| Tuesday, January 12, 2010 |
| 3 Decades and Counting |
At 4:11pm today, I officially turned 30. Oooopsss! Did I just say 30? I meant, 25. LOL! ü (I seem to have stopped counting at 25 haha!). And after how many years of not being able to hear Mass on my birthday, I finally had the chance to do so this afternoon (errr... yesterday, technically) because Yay! I was on VL. hehe.
My cousins did this colorful thingy on the wall made up of colored papers which spelled, "Happy 30th Birthday, Achi!" and even had balloons on its sides. Even our room had balloons at the ceiling! Sheesh, I really feel so LOVED. I had presents, too. Which, all the more made me feel really really GUILTY because I haven't even gotten them Christmas presents yet, until now. I promise to get them something special, yung tipong pinag-isipan naman. Something that they would really like. ü
Happy Birthday, Me! Now it's time to post some chismis...
Saw my Ex last Saturday, and he told me that Ms. Pegasus is apparently pregnant... by him! What news! Well, goodluck to my Ex. He doesn't seem to know what he's getting into.
I'm gonna be all showbiz about this blog, and I won't deny the fact that I was quite delighted (o sige na nga, wag nang plastik... Happy!) about the "Showtime" suspension (not because I don't like the show, I actually love it because of Vice Ganda), but because Ms. Pegasus really proved her worth.
To you, Ms. Pegasus... I could only watch and wait for you to self-destruct. Your brains (and mouth) are on the wrong parts. Maybe you'd like to check out the comments posted on Facebook's "May Nagtext - Vice Ganda" about you. LMAO! And please, stop sending me messages on my Friendster account (`coz I couldn't reply to your messages bcoz of your settings) and telling me that I'm ugly when in fact, you're just SO INSECURE OF ME! No further comments, your honor. The talks about you on Facebook are enough for you to be ashamed of yourself.
That's it for now, lovers! You know you love me. XOXO. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 1/12/2010 12:38:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, December 30, 2009 |
| 2009 Prediction for Goats |
Got this idea from Nonie, to somehow make a sense of what's been happening to me this year. I almost fell off my seat. Here's what it said:
A prediction in the year of the ox this 2009 is that a person born in the year of the Goat (1919, 1931, 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003), can look forward to better luck in love in 2009 “ both for male and female. A single Goat will be luckier than the previous year when it comes to dating, in fact being single and free could have contributed to this change of fate. While those who are already in a relationship would be looking forward to a more harmonious relationship, although the year could also bring them more time off from each other.
However, the Goat should watch out for love triangles that can destroy the otherwise harmonious relationship with their partner. And with two stars of Gossip shining upon them, the Goat should learn to stay quiet and just work harder, remembering to mind his own business and not sticking his nose on others, otherwise, it could only lead him to more trouble.
And here's another one (ouch sapul!):
LOVE
Fluctuating love luck. Frequent and violent mood changes along with emotional turbulance will affect your romance. The search for a suitable life partner will be fruitless. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 12/30/2009 09:07:00 AM |
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| Sunday, December 06, 2009 |
| i have a stalker! yipee! |
"she" made a friendster account of my ex and sent me 2 private messages. she also managed to find me on twitter! she reposted one and replied to two of my tweets. interesting, huh? she must be my ex's new flavor of the season...
i live for the drama! bring it! |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 12/06/2009 04:32:00 AM |
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| Monday, November 02, 2009 |
| ♥ Christine ♥ |
Just this afternoon....
Gian: Christine is proud
me: Why?
Gian: Because you are proud of me (very true indeed!)
... and then again
Gian: Christine is happy
me: Why?
Gian: Because I love you! (awww... he's the sweetest) |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 11/02/2009 12:27:00 AM |
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| Saturday, October 31, 2009 |
| Gossip Girl: O & O |
Everyone loves a good gossip. Especially if you know who's the person involved. Well, well... looks like Lonely Boy ain't too lonely after all.
You know you love me.
xoxo,
Gossip Girl
*****
The 37-year-old actress says that she wants to settle down with her fiancé, who hails from Malolos, Bulacan. Osang refused to reveal the complete name of the guy, but simply referred to him as Atty. R.B. The actress said that he is 40 years old, three years older than her.
"Noong nasa Iloilo ako, nagkahiwalay kami [her boyfriend]. Parang cool-off kami habang nagsu-shooting ako [for Wanted: Border]. So, itinawid ko ang movie na kunwari wala akong nararamdaman, pero ang sakit-sakit. Tapos umuwi ako pero pinaglaban niya yun. He said sorry at sinabi ko, bumalik na ko sa asawa ko. Pero lumaban pa rin siya.
"Then nag-text siya na, 'Hey, today is the 15th of the month, it's our anniversary and I'm enjoying the day alone.' So sabi ko, 'Wanna go out?' Dinala ko siya sa Bellini's sa Shoe Expo sa Cubao. After nun, nakita niya bumalik na yung amor ko then after nun, sabi ko, 'Don't worry, kung mawawala ka, ikaw naman ang ipaglalaban ko.'" Osang goes on to share the qualities that she likes about her fiancé. "He's a Christian at napaka-prinsipyadong tao. He doesn't stay in the house. Pag sinasabi ko, dito ka na matulog, ayaw niya. May pride siya at may urbanidad. Saka siya lang kasi ang ino-oohan ng mga anak ko [Grace and Onyok]. They were rooting for this guy," says Osang with a smile.
How did they meet? "Through a basketball player. Hindi natuloy ang blind date namin kasi nagsu-shooting kami noon ng Baklas [indie film that she starred in and co-directed with Neal Tan]. It was supposed to be his birthday, July 2, pero hindi ako nakarating. So ni-reset ang date namin at nag-click agad kami. It was love at first sight."
She reveals that they have been a couple since July 15, 2008. What did she like most about him? "Tall, dark and handsome. And he loves his mother so much. Yun kasi ang basehan ko sa pagpili. Pag mahal na mahal niya ang ina niya, mamahalin din ako nang todo at maiintindihan niya ang pagiging nanay ko."
When do they plan to get married? "Tinanong ko siya kung by Christmas tapos na yung mga papeles at sabi niya baka hindi. So tinanong ko, kung sa birthday ko? Tapos na tapos na yun. E, sa May [2010] ang birthday ko." |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 10/31/2009 04:17:00 PM |
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| Friday, October 09, 2009 |
| No Promises - Shayne Ward |
@RMB-- you know how i used to have this twisted belief that i would be the one who can change you? That I was THE ONE for you? Now I learned that indeed, I was the one-- among others. That you, my wild horse, can never be tied down. Be free. The same way I, the fragile butterfly, must be set free to spread my colorful wings and fly. Sayang naman if I won't flaunt my beautiful colors and people won't get to see and appreciate. *haha*
How i wish it was that easy to be the way we were. If only you knew the battles that i had with myself, over and over and over. Head, heart? Heart, head? *sigh* It's you. Only you. But we can never be. I've come to terms with that.
*did you just hear the sound of my heart breaking?* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 10/09/2009 11:48:00 PM |
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| Tuesday, October 06, 2009 |
| Proud Mama |
"Mama, let's grow pumpkins, not bugs!" -- Gian, on my Barn Buddy page
amazed as usual. i didn't know he could recognize the pumpkin already. and it's on facebook, not on tv! looked like a giant orange to me. haha! again, i underestimated my brainy kiddo.
Ninang: I will not buy you Stepney (from thomas train)
Gian: That's terrible!!!
me to myself: jeez. this is my 3-year-old kid, right?
`nuf said. that's MY BOY! *proud Mama* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 10/06/2009 12:07:00 AM |
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| Thursday, September 17, 2009 |
| My Wonder Boy |
Gian bit my iPod earphone wires. I didn't get too angry, though. I just had the stern look that said, "I'm angry Gian, better not do that again!" He said sorry fast enough to erase the anger. He added, "I made mistakes. My mouth bite (bit) the wires. I phah (read: hit) my mouth!" Of course I said that it's okay, that he said sorry anyway and it's alright. He even told me, "it's under control." My amazement was enough to melt away the slight irritation that I had. Once again, his charms worked its wonders on me. Old news.
Still guilty, Gian said, "You're my bestfriend, Mama!" I shook my head. Then he says, "what's the matter, Mama?" LOL.
Jeez... and he's only 3 years old! A few years more and I'd me out smacked.
I'd still love you though, Gian... To the moon and back ♥ |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 9/17/2009 12:22:00 AM |
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| Saturday, August 29, 2009 |
| Happy Birthday, Michael! |
 This is very nice. Good job, Google!
♥ Happy Birthday, Michael! ♥
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 8/29/2009 11:09:00 PM |
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| Friday, August 21, 2009 |
| long time no blog! |
über busy, that's why. but really, i've accomplished a lot. lemme try to list `em down... - made it thru Gian's 1st wedding entourage stint (8.02.09 as the Bible Bearer)
- read 2 books in one weekend (d.s. novel & a-list)
- up and running project! yay!
- successful with Gian's impetigo *whew* (great job, self!)
- Ye Dang, finally! (sooo yummy! thanks to Jing & Lab for patiently waiting for me... always)
- learned how to play poker! (and it's a winning night tonight. not IRL tho. facebook lang. hihi)
- got in touch again with a long-lost dear friend (i missed you, panget!)
- livin', lovin' and appreciating the little things that make me smile - |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 8/21/2009 02:05:00 AM |
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| Friday, July 17, 2009 |
| Crocs' Downfall |
Would this mean.... price slash? Hehehe... ü
The shoes were hitting a saturation point; the problem with a nearly indestructible product is that shoppers rarely need to replace it.
Who needs a second pair of Crocs in a recession, particularly when the first pair is holding up just fine?
The company swung from a profit of $168.2 million in fiscal year 2007 to a loss of $185.1 million last year. In its annual report, Crocs said that an independent auditor expressed concerns about "conditions that raise substantial doubt about our ability to continue." Its stock price has plummeted 76 percent. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 7/17/2009 08:53:00 PM |
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| Tuesday, June 30, 2009 |
| Who is Peter Cullen? |
no, he's not related to Twilight's Edward Cullen...
started off tonight by downloading some transformers tone for my fone. of course, the most popular one is Optimus Prime's command, "autobots, transform!" hearing it over and over again, i can't help but associate the voice with the one in "Voltron, defender of the universe." so there, out of curiosity, i wiki'd the voices behind Optimus and from the ones in Voltron. viola! there goes Peter Cullen! nice voice, very distinctive... i can still recognize it like it was just yesterday, when i spent my childhood days watching cartoons such as Diamos, Voltes V, Bioman, Shaider, Captain America, Mighty Thor, He-Man, Spiderman, Batman, Popeye, GI Joe, Ghostbusters... i sound like a boy to me. haha! admittedly, i am kinda boy-ish. My Little Pony and Friends, Rainbow Brite -- lame! Care Bears were cute, though. gawd, miss those days! long live the 80's-90's era!!! |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/30/2009 11:15:00 PM |
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| Michael Joseph Jackson (August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009) |
 
KING OF POP
There can only be one.
Your music will live forever.
Rest in Peace, MJ.in our darkest hour / in my deepest despair
will you still care? / will you be there?
in my trials / and my tripulations / through my doubts / and frustrations
in my violence / in my turbulence / through my fear / and my confessions
in my anguish / and my pain / through my joy / and my sorrow
in the promise of another tomorrow / i'll never let you part
... for you're always in my heart
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/30/2009 12:38:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, June 17, 2009 |
| My ex "Boo" |
| i just learned that Pao (Paolo or "boo" as i used to call him) is back in Manila from Dubai(?), after almost a year of not hearing from him. and it was only today when i learned that his given name is Juan Paolo. after how many years of knowing him, imagine that! sheesh. oh well, we've never had to chance to meet personally. i've met him via chat when i was in hongkong way back 2005 (i think). or was it during my Gunbound addiction days? haha, jeez i'm confused. though i know there's also john whom i also met during my GB days. that i'm very sure of. anyways, Pao was my "cyber love." i remember how we'd stay up late and chat until the wee hours. he'd print out my pictures and post it on the walls of his room. he was soooo sweet. *sigh, sigh* those were the days... |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/17/2009 04:34:00 AM |
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| So, what's new?! |
  My 120 gb iPod Classic  My Gisele Bündchen Ipanema |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/17/2009 04:04:00 AM |
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| Saturday, June 06, 2009 |
| No, no, no please! |
Lord, please don't let Gian catch flu... please please... =(
he had flu last year, right about the same time as now. i'm wondering if it's because of the weather change...? feb and june... ugh! same for `08 and `09.
no, not this june, enough for this year, please... =( |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/06/2009 04:34:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, June 03, 2009 |
| Happy Day! |
had a great discovery today... Cash and Carry! so happy! was able to buy Sweep #2 for 50 bucks, and it's so new! got an oatmeal soap too. so cheap, yet bigger in size than the ones that i usually get. have yet to try it, tho. soap addict! my simple pleasures *grins* Ü
comfort food for dinner. omelet and hotdogs. yum! monique makes the best omelets, i swear! way better than the fancy ones at the hotels. gian had dinner with me, and boy, he ate a lot! growing kid, eh!
gian will more or less have his first stint in a wedding entourage. i dunno if he's gonna be a ring bearer or the bible bearer. gosh... i can't imagine! he might do his funny imitation of Mr. Bean when he's (silly) confused. funny face. ought to take his picture when he does that. it's too funny. makes Mama smile or laugh a lot *^_^*
had dinner last sunday at TGIF rob place. orange rice for Gi! i was so amazed... he was able to recognize a golf club, and actually say what it was! same with a baseball bat! my cousin told me that she didn't know that it's called a 'golf club', she just knew it was used for golf. haha! Gian's way smarter than his aunt! LOL! he also saw a disco ball and pointed it out to me. then he went dancing. he even invited me to dance with him. he's so cute! the waiters noticed him and was dancing with him, too! such a charmer! Ü
malling, malling. Gian removed his sandals while we were walking, then he stopped and said, "Mama, i wear your crocs!" i was like... "huh?" i didn't react immediately because i was caught off-guard on how was able to have thought of that, and actually put it into words. he then rephrased what he said, "I borrow your crocs, Mama!" (imagine that, he thought he had to rephrase it so I'll understand!)
i really really really couldn't ask for more. heaven sent you are, Gian my love Ü |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 6/03/2009 10:09:00 PM |
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| Saturday, May 30, 2009 |
| Week of May 24, 2009 |
boom! the Katrina-Hayden scandal! haven't seen it, fyi. so why am i blogging about this?! hmmm... i pity her for the public humiliation that she's going thru. before this video came out, her affair with Hayden was already publicized. stones were thrown. kudos to her, she owned up to it and was able to stand up again. but the video scandal?! my heart goes out to her. yes, she didn't do the right thing, but it's another story that the video's circulating like the air around us. and i totally agree with Boy Abunda's take on the "drugs or no drugs" issue, where Kris said that there was no categorical denial that there were drugs involved on the issued statement given by Katrina's lawyer on The Buzz last Sunday. i don't remember the exact words, but the thought of Boy's statement was that, "drugs or no drugs" simply means that drugs is not the issue, and we must not stray from the actual cause of this scandal, the video reproduction. i was really impressed. nice p.o.v.!
speaking of Boy Abunda, i was able to again, come across him on the same week, only this time, it was in person. he was a guest speaker in the seminar that i attended last May 26 at the Dusit Hotel.
fast forward Friday, May 29. Mikko's post birthday celeb @ Giligan's Island Park Square Makati. it was fun... well, sort of. there were some things which would've made it better. pause. did i say "things"? stop. speak no evil. hahaha *winks*
take me to bed or lose me forever. ZzzZzZZz....
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/30/2009 03:44:00 AM |
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| Thursday, May 21, 2009 |
| A Dream Come True (hopefully!) |
we were asked to join the photo shoot with none other than our CM today! haha i wonder where it's gonna be published... earth to me! haha i don't even know if the pictures with us there will even be chosen. har har! but it was great. i had my first. *teehee* it's been a secret dream of mine to be on a print ad (now it's not-so-secret anymore). i'll buy copies of it for sure (if ever it gets published ha), and someday Gian will see it and he'll be very proud of his mama *dreamy grin*
met up with D's uncle, Tito Jay tonight. he was the one who unselfishly toured us when we visited Ilocos last March. we had dinner at Sinjuku Ramen House and he loved it. well, all of us actually! great food! yum yum yum! my favorite beef was not available tho, so we settled for seafood tepan instead. loved it too! everything's soooo yummy!
i was so touched when Tito Jay told me that if they have a new dog, they already talked about it that they will either name it Clifford, T-bone, or Cleo. why? because when we were in Ilocos, Gian saw their pets and called them by those names (from Clifford the Red Dog). so sweet of them to remember! Gian is sooooo loved talaga! *proud mama grin*
drove around the metro `coz we had to deposit Tito Jay at Richmonde Hotel, followed by D. *tired & sleepy* good thing Natz drives really fast that's why I was also deposited before the clock striked 12. i still wanna watch Gossip Girl season 2 finale... *zZzZZzZz...* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/21/2009 11:43:00 PM |
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| Milestones |
Gian, who woke up at the farthest side of the bed yesterday morning, said: "Mama, let's sleep (off?) together!" He wanted me to lie down beside him! Sweeeeeeet! My one true love. My knight in shinning armor. *awwwww* I couldn't ask for more *^_^*
For 2 days already, he's been going to the toilet on his own (to poop). He removes his shorts, then goes to sit on the throne... alone! He will just come out and call someone to wash him up afterwards. Amazing kid! (i love my own, anak ko yan eh!)
And last night, he said, "you're awesome!" He doesn't even realize it, but HE is the awesome one *^_^* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/21/2009 03:56:00 PM |
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| Saturday, May 16, 2009 |
| I heart Charles Bass |
non-Gossip Girl fans, you won't be able to relate (so you may quit reading this, and might as well close the window. now. hahaha, stalker!).
i soooo love Chuck. his personality is to extreme, very unpredictable. yet, his love for Blair... *awww* where's my Chuck?! color my world!!!
latest episode that i've seen is episode 24 of season 2. so far, my most favorite line of Chuck was on the scene when he was talking to his bestfriend, Nate (ep 21, "seder anything"). they were talking about Blair, of course.
Chuck to Nate: “Its stupid for you to want her, to be anything other than she is… Anyway Blair is changing, because she could have had me… she chose you. Now she just needs someone to believe in her.” *awwww*
my next favorite line would still be Chuck's. this time, she was talking to S, about B, still (who else?!)...
C to S: "Because I love her... I can't make her happy" (after the scene when Chuck told B that "it's just a game" and S asked C why he said that, after B walked out in tears)
***sad face, one tear, sniff sniff***
season 2, episode 23 "the wrath of con"... my favorite!!! i've watched this like... 3x? listened to the audio about 2-3 times also. hahaha! i sooo love the Blair-Chuck loveteam!
again... where's my Chuck?! such a hopeless romantic... at least in reel life. hehe!
you know you love me.
xoxo, cbt |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/16/2009 01:42:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, May 13, 2009 |
| P, my number two |
too busy the past days... so many things to do, so little time. have yet to plan Gian's 3rd *sigh*
rant, rant.... grunt, grunt... i'll miss you, P. i will never forget our gossip girl marathons... i felt my heart breaking the night i was putting you on tabula rasa. sadness fell on me. with a heavy heart. i'm sorry i had to let you go, i was given no choice. your memories will be cherished *sniff sniff*
lighter, happier notes... Gian's blurbs...
* happy muhh-vers (mother's) day, Mama!
* i'm proud of you, Mama! you draw Gordon & Rosie! (after drawing them, with pat on the shoulder to match. aww... sweet!)
* be quiet! you're a statue! (when everyone's too noisy and he can barely hear his t.v.)
* look at that, Mama! see that? (then describes what he sees)
* that's terrible!
* bother, bother! (when he's irritated or sumthin' to that effect)
* i'm the lifeguard!
* i think so!
* Diesel (the engine) is very pleased!
* i see something! (when he spots something of interest)
* what's that thing?!
** lately, he's been calling me "Mommy" instead of the usual "Mama" -- cute!
** he can draw a face! looks like a potato head haha!
** he used to say "magandang amuga" instead of "umaga" he got it right now tho. but "amuga" is waaaayyy cute! haha!
i love you, Gi! to the moon... and back. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/13/2009 11:27:00 PM |
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| Tuesday, May 05, 2009 |
| "Bakit Single Ka Pa?" Quiz |
took one of the many Facebook quizzes. bakit nga ba single pa ko??!!
the result: PIHIKAN KA!
ang daming may gusto syo. ayaw mo lang kasi panget o di mo trip ang ugali. pwede ka naman magkaroon ng instant lovelife kung gugustuhin mo. pero ayaw mo talaga patulan yung mga nagkakagusto sayo. ok lang yan.. kung ayaw mo edi wag mo! magtiis kang single!
so mean!!! but yeah, in many many ways, this is very true! i'd rather be single than be with the wrong person. i know i'd find my way back into love... love will find me. at the most unexpected places, at the right time... my own sweet time. in God's time.
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/05/2009 12:41:00 AM |
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| Friday, May 01, 2009 |
| Thursday is the new Friday!!! |
after a meeting at G5, guilly's with D. makati rec ops were also there! just stayed for less than an hour, but nonetheless, long enuf to be tipsy. but only for a few minutes. 2 beers and a jag.... thanks D and arg! looking forward to the next one. hopefully, the gang would be there (calling kt, miks, rey)
sawap! swabe. steady lang. xoxo. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 5/01/2009 03:21:00 AM |
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| Tuesday, April 28, 2009 |
| What is your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)? |
My EQ is 142
(wahaha is this even reliable? got this quiz from Facebook)
You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin.
You are warm and open. Even when life gets you down, you're unafraid of the world and its challenges.
You are comfortable with who you are. And you accept your weaknesses - as well as the weaknesses of others.
While you are quite stable, you don't respond perfectly to every bad situation that comes up.
But you have enough emotional intelligence to know when you need a course correction.
after reading it thru... yes, this is me. *^_^*
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/28/2009 12:39:00 AM |
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| Saturday, April 25, 2009 |
| *whew* |
seems like i'm getting better and better at pissing off the opposite gender... haha! but really, it wasn't my fault. and NO, i'm not being defensive. i only protected myself, i swear! i would have been violated if it was the other way around. thank heavens!
p.s. sorry, M. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/25/2009 02:34:00 AM |
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| Saturday, April 18, 2009 |
| One Friday Evening at the so-called Super Club |
EMBASSY. fancy huh? all the queue outside the grand white establishment. got in for free, no lines for us! guestlist, how lucky! me, glammed up and ready to party.... hmmm. first few minutes was okay. what a thrill to be in the place where at 12 midnight, people where still lining up to get in, where it already closes at 2.30am. how cool was that?
i later on realized that the people here, well, most of them, are lonely hopefuls trying to get a shot out of their lonely lives (yes, count me in for the experiment, but i'm not gonna go thru it again). well, most of them, i'm not saying ALL of them... trying to hook up with somebody cool in this swell place. the music was great, because they remix the popular songs already, whatever genre it is, that's why! i got inside the r&b room, btw. tho, i also got inside the trance room later on (but this time, it was MY charms that worked our way thru, mind you). this room was less packed and way cool in temperature, so to speak. sweaty to be inside r&b... uggh!
it was an experience, but this is not my cup of tea. i much more enjoyed the company and conversations with the people whom i was with, after the "party." it's what's outside that's real -- sans the music, flashy lights, smoke-filled air and the unusually crowded people grooving to the sounds which i don't even know if they really like. no booze, just all-natural high (dislcaimer: i'm not saying that i did'nt have my share of 2 beers and a rhum coke... hehe)
should've dropped by nbc tent for the jack daniel's event, where my colleagues were. must have been more fun! |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/18/2009 04:22:00 AM |
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| Thursday, April 16, 2009 |
| What's on my Playlist? |
love love music! can't live without `em. what's on my iPod playlist...?
latest addition (like tonight): never ending (kaskade)
recently deleted: poker face (lady gaga) **eww... i was just curious, okay?!**
most # of play count: no air (jordin sparks & chris brown) **85! haha**
favorite exercise song: closer (ne-yo)
in-love songs: captured (xtian b. & sitti); heaven sent & this is us (keyshia cole); next to you (jordin s.), i choose you (mario)
happy songs: take me away (stacie orrico); t-shirt (shontelle); bartender (t-pain)
emo songs: the man who can't be moved & breakeven (the script); each passing night (gary v.), teardrops on my guitar (taylor swift)
"helplessness" songs (sung on top of my lungs): no air (jordin s.), i want you (bon jovi)
feel-good songs: i'm yours (jason mraz); no rain (blind melon); never you done that (general public)
strut songs: fashionista (jimmy james); glamorous (fergie)
sing-along with songs: errr... i sing along with almost all of it. hahaha!
why-is-this-even-on-my-playlist: dangerous (akon), bubbly (colbie caillat), heartless (kanye west), savage garden songs (i love them. used to. affinity!)
i wish i had now (like this very moment na!): on paper (3 o'clock); always (dv8)
flirty: out of this club (pcd); take me away (stacie o.), touch my body (mariah)
then-till-now fave: waiting for a star to fall (boy meets girl)
old school: waiting for a star to fall; dying inside (timmy thomas)
albums i wish i had: all of eraserheads' & bon jovi's; music box (mariah); 89.9 magic's POW (party on weekends); the best of nirvana (if there's such hehe); phil collins serious hits live!
my life's theme: big girls don't cry (fergie)
fave inside: gwen stefani :D |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/16/2009 12:19:00 AM |
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| Thursday, April 09, 2009 |
| Fast and the Furious 4 |
saw the film earlier tonight (wed, april 8) with my movie date, monique and chaperone manel. stunts were great! but i think they were trying too hard to relive the greatness of the 1st installment of the film, the Fast and the Furious, like repeating some of the lines in the F&tF. anyhoo, it was really great to see them back together (parang mag jowa lang haha!) on this one, and paul waker was sooo hot! kinda reminds me of someone, had he been thinner, younger, and blue-eyed. hahaha! same deep set eyes and pointed nose. g-w-a-p-o!!! hahaha!
i felt sick when i got home. maybe because i only ate a sandwich, but gulped on Coke before i even ate. i felt like vomitting. i collapsed on the bed and snoozed instantly. i'm awake now, but still feel sick to the stomach. uggh... good thing, it's a holiday on the next few days.
btw, speaking of films... can't wait to watch Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen! Angels and Demons maybe? i dunno, i've already read the book and it was great. i don't want to end up comparing the movie to book to my dismay.
movie date, anyone? |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/09/2009 01:40:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, April 08, 2009 |
| Marinduque turned sour.... |
yes, not pushing thru, got that right! there were too many glitch in the matrix. my gut tells me not to go. and so does Someone. da who?!
for the many reasons...
1st: eus telling me last friday that jason can't go with us
2nd: gian having a slight fever last saturday
3rd: no transportation (shuttle/van) available, saturday
4th: satuday still, borrowed zette's revo. negative. they were planning to go to baguio daw
come monday, i called several bus lines and decided on JAC liner. i was able to talk to dispatcher Kuya Bob and he told me that i must book on wednesday morning if we are going to take the wednesday 6pm trip. i convinced him to allow the booking be made on tuesday night, since i can drop by after work (i'm on leave wednesday and it would be an extra trip for me). he agreed, and i thought... we can still make it! we can do this!
talked to donna today, and she discovered that there's an available shuttle for thursday! i inquired, and was told that the shuttle takes off 10am. no, i did not reserve, I have my JAC liner departing on wednesday p.m. (which i preferred). i'm still on the right track. then i called the van lady Aling Verma for the Marinduque-Manila trip back reservation.
the 5th sign: sunday trip back to Manila was fully booked. its okay. i expected it. saturday, maybe? negative din.
okay, i'll settle for a waitlist. i have a plan B, ako pa! we'll just leave on saturday to partly avoid the great influx of vacationists who will prefer to come back on sunday. great plan! go go go! we're sure to be in Manila by Easter if we leave saturday.
after contemplating (again) for 1 million times, it was really a go for us. 101%! i even printed out our "to see" places. i called up JAC liner and looked for dispatcher Bob before coming by. when he's already on the line, he told me that the one and only trip for tomorrow was already full! wtf?! i thought the bookings were to be made on wednesday morning? here i thought i'd be first in line `coz i'm already booking tonight. NOT!!! apparently, the new provision came from the head office. wtf?! i talked to him yesterday, and now he's telling me that it suddenly changed?! i told him that he should have listed my name yesterday when i talked to him. i wanted to cry that very moment. it was heart-breaking. and i was angry at the same time. furious! i could have burnt him right then and there. i was all up for it, after all the hurdles. now what?!
i took a deep breath, gulped water. exhale. it's alright. i realized that it must be God's way of telling me not to go. He knows me too well, i guess. that i'd just have fun under the sun, on the beach, cam whoring and striking many poses, while His son, whom He sacrificed, is carrying the weight of all the sins in the world on His shoulders. not to mention death by crucifixion, and at that, being shamed while he suffers and slowly dies for me, for all mankind. this is not the time of the year to be selfish. eat fish, but not to be selfish. haha corny ko! *grins*
thank you, dearest Father, for making me feel loved. thanks for giving special attention to me. thru all the hassles and the glitch, i realized it was YOU telling me not to go, Your divine intervention, for whatever reason. Thy will be done.
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 4/08/2009 12:01:00 AM |
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| Monday, March 30, 2009 |
| Back from Ilocos! |
too many stories to tell, i dunno where to start. the trip was bitin! a day more, maybe? the water ain't too pretty tho, my Gian was stung by effin' jellyfish. good thing they were only small. poor Gian. he told Dianne (the birthday girl), "tita, the waves bit me!" then D felt it too. back to shore. uggghhhh! damn jellyfish! bad, bad! Gian was brave though, no tears. he just held on to mama and he's fine. he just didn't want us to hold his left arm.
day 1, March 27, we arrived Batac Ilocos Norte at around 7am. Marcos Museum. can't miss it, loyalist ata ako! Gi and i gave a salute to the great Marcos before we left. eerie place! it was dark inside, cold, with eerie background music. next up, we tasted the ilocos empanada. errr... it was so-so for me. nothin' much.
we were fetched by tito jay (he's very nice i swear!) on the empanada stretch, Dianne's uncle (her mom's cousin) and went then went to Paoay Church. i can't remember if it's the biggest(?) or the oldest(?) church in Asia. i'll have to ask D again. haha. what i remembered was that, Ilocos Norte's churches have bell towers beside them, while in Ilocos Sur, the bell towers are across the church.
off to pagudpud, which i later learned was 88 kms from Laoag. tito jay drove us, back and forth, and back to Laoag again the next day! he's really so nice. anyways, we passed by the Burgos Lighthouse, picture picture. we were lucky enough to reach the top of the lighthouse, because for a time, the lighthouse was closed for renovation (last year, D and her teammates weren't successful). lunch. then off to Bangui Windmills. amazing! i have no decent picture there (i had to run after Gi because he was attacking the beach!), but my Gian did have a perfect shot (thanks, tito natz!). it was really great to finally see it live in action. haha!
yesssssssssssss! pagudpud na after! checked in at Villa del Mar Beach Resort. we wasted no time. ay, sila lang pala. i didn't swim, spectator lang ako. i was really tired, for not getting proper sleep the night before and running around chasing my energizer bunny. Gian did have a grand time at the pool tho (thanks again to tito natz). dinner was great, tho i didn't really get to enjoy it very much because i was carrying my sleeping baby while eating. back to barracks, then, inuman na!!! mikko and i stayed up, not as originally planned by the beach sana, because i had to be around just in case Gian suddenly wakes up. bitin yung drinks namin, deymz. had quite a challenge getting more booze, and my charms were tested. it paid off, we had matador shots from kuya (i think he's a staff of the resort). we were given a better offer, a whole bottle, which i refused because i can't afford to be so drunk coz i'm on call, 24 hours. hehe. a cupful was quite enough for us.
day 2, March 28, happy birthday, D! ayun, nature's gift to her, jellyfish! but Gi had most of it actually. because of that, i opted to stay by the shade with Gi, while the gang went farther off the beach and had a lot of very nice pics taken. im so inggit! i had few pictures on this trip. as katie said, i had a few na nga, and most of them were either i was carrying Gian or i was bent holding him. oh well. duty calls talaga. can't not.
did i mention that my body was aching all over? full body workout! ugh. i need a massage! anyways, back to my kwento... we checked out and had lunch at this great restaurant (where we also had our dinner) Emohruo Beach Restobar, situated in between Apo Idon and Evangeline's Resort. EMO!!! haha nice name. service was great, and food was amazing!
drive back to Laoag. met D's mom and sib. Gian calls D's mother "Mom." sweet. gusto na shang ampunin. hehe. had snacks, then off to the market. then we went to Sarat, went to Sta. Monica Parish and Irene's guest house which was donated and now converted into Sarat municipal hall. Sta. Monica ruins! spooky as Gi said over and over. from the tour's start to finish, mind you. gave me and katie the chills. haha! imagine how it was a torture chamber! mikko said it was featured in last year's MGB's halloween episode. loaded dude! well, Ilocos is loaded according to miks. picture picture. back to Laoag, walked around the streets and passed by a grotto of Saint Bernadette. i particularly asked to have a pic taken. hehe.
went back to D's for dinner (a feast, if i must say). the gang went with tito jay for the Earth Hour while i stayed home with D's family and Gian. tired na talaga ako from all the walking and the carrying. when i couldn't endure it anymore, i asked mikko and natz to carry Gi na that afternoon. we were walking around the streets, and i wouldn't risk having out of my clutches and run around. streets yun!
can i just say that my baby was already very anxious because he misses playhouse disney?! he was singing the mickey mouse clubhouse song, and saying "watch thomas train" or "where's thomas?" over and over and over. he finally settled for monsters, inc dvd that night. thanks to the kindness of D's family, they bought the dvd esp for Gian. i kinda dozed off while waiting for Gi to sleep, took a bath when i woke up, washed bottles, and went down to the gang where they were having a booze. had only a few shots tho, we're off to manila early the next day.
ill end my story now. just thinking about the trip back to manila is tiring enough. gosh! thank God for cup noodles! thank God that Gi was born a lakwatsero and endured long trips! he wasn't what i expected him to be since it was a day trip back, as compared to our trip going to Ilocos which was nighttime. to top it off, we were being charged a 100 bucks from UST to our place, just when we were already settled inside the cab, with me carrying the sleeping Gian at 11pm. i got really irrate and told the cab driver to unload my bags. and luggage. imagine!!! it wouldn't cost me 50 bucks if he flagged down the meter! we rode the trike instead, for 50 bucks. Gi was awake by this time that we were shifting transpo. good thing. bad cab driver, taking advantage of the situation!
summing it up, it was a great trip. lots of sights and places to see. great company, good friends. wished someone(s) were there tho. (they) would have enjoyed it, too.
ooopsss, i forgot about the 2 shoplifting lolas which i witnessed in action at the stop over on our trip back. katakot. i would have told the cashier, but it wasn't my territory. baka makulam pa ko. and i didn't spot any security guards. i chose to bite my tongue. i told my friends tho. it was really scary. miks was seated beside one of the culprit lolas pa naman. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/30/2009 09:07:00 PM |
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| Thursday, March 26, 2009 |
| Ms. Understood a.k.a. Me |
let me recollect my thoughts. i got so furious today because of one phone call. how mature! well, let me take my shoes off, wear `em, then walk a mile... let me guide you through.
oh, i changed my mind. well, at least not in details. i finally i had to tell a stranger off because the simple conversations which used to be normal doesn't seem or feel right anymore. a simple "take care" is shattering. it's the kindness that kills me. or concern. whatever. i don't think it's necessary anymore. it's not what it used to be. however which way i look at it, it will never be the same again. ever.
no, i'm not selfish, it goes both ways. how can you move if you're still dwelling on the past? you would know better, dreamer! hmmm... proactive subconsciousness! haha! as for me, i have to flush it out of my system. it's not easy you know, just when i thought i was invincible! just when i thought i could trust again. it was good while it lasted. good times! it's hard not to look back, i must admit. and i know i've said this over and over. I'M SORRY. for making you feel the way you felt. in the deepest of the deepest part of me, i'm sorry. you'll always have a special place (niche?) haha. seriously. it's like loving someone from the grave. you'll always hold them dear, but you can no longer reach them, and they won't be there anymore.
go for what makes you happy. don't look back. it will stall you from what lies ahead. we'll both be fine. nobody said it would be easy. no promises. no more. it's over now. let's go on and take our bows.
thank you Yahoo music for the background music. what a way to start blogging!
*big girls don't cry (fergie)
*over you (daughtry)
*breathe (anna nalick)
*viva la vida (coldplay)
*i hate this part (pcd)
xoxo,
c.b.t.
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/26/2009 01:00:00 AM |
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| Monday, March 23, 2009 |
| You Know You Love Me |
i have this fever...
xoxo,
cbt |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/23/2009 12:32:00 AM |
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| Saturday, March 21, 2009 |
| Married! |
i was, in my dream. one of the few dreams which i remember after waking up. it was beautiful and touching. i didn't recognize who the guy was tho, his physique resembled that of my ex's (LML), but i know it wasn't him.
going back, i dreamt about the kissing part of the wedding. the guy was all tears when we kissed. that was our first time to kiss, ever. i guess that's why he's crying. wow, "true love!" haha (jeanice would say that). in my dream, i felt in my heart the overflowing love from the guy's heart. and it brought tears in my eyes, too. perfect!
i woke up this morning thinking about my dream. weird. i never saw myself getting married. well, at least after what happened to me. before... yes, maybe. when i was young, idealistic. now? that's too far-fetched. bitter? well, if it comes, it comes. if it doesn't, it's alright. i already have my Gian. everything happens for a reason. whatever God's plans are for me, i would gladly accept it. He wouldn't give us anything that we can't handle. *^_^*
lighter note... i was reading the newspaper this morning. Side A is having a concert! i wanna watch!!! dang, its on March 27th! no no... monique saw the other side of the broadsheet, Craig David's having a concert too! i want, i want! i turned the page for the details... March 27th! not again *sigh* oh well. i missed too many concerts already, so i guess it's fine.
break's over. back to baby-sitting, which i do best and love the most *winks* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/21/2009 09:46:00 AM |
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| Friday, March 20, 2009 |
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Few days to go, and we're gonna hit the beach! *woot woot* We're touring Ilocos and Pagudpud (it's spelled that way pala, I got it all wrong on my previous post), Gian's going to see real lighthouse and the windmills! Hope we get to visit the Marcos Museum (loyalista yata `to, hehe!) as soon as we arrive `coz it's open only on weekdays.
This trip will be an acid test for my Gian (and me, of course). We'll be travelling (by land via bus) for like... 8 to 9 hours? Goodluck chuck! But we're taking the last trip so hopefully, he'll just be sleeping the whole time.
Tara na, biyahe tayo!!! *grins*
Oh, by the way...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DADDY!
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/20/2009 01:07:00 AM |
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| My Cookie Monster |
I bought Gi a pack of Chips Ahoy the other night. When I arrived home gave it to him, I told him that he can't eat it that night, but he can do so the next day when he wakes up. Of course he wants me to open it that very moment, he's been bugging me with "cookie! cookie" the past days. I talked to him again and said that I promise to give his cookie the next day.
Gian, trying to push his luck and outsmart me, said: "Good morning, Mama!!!" I laughed really hard! And the look on his face... he looked like a glowing too-cute-to-be-true lightbulb with his brilliant idea, thinking that he nailed it! It really really took a lot of self-control not to give in to this charming and adorably funny kid. He almost got me there.
Smart-ass... trying to Outthink and Outdo his Mama! hehehe. Love you to bits, Gi. You're my heaven sent *^_^* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/20/2009 12:41:00 AM |
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| Monday, March 16, 2009 |
| Captured |
Fell in love with this song the first time I heard this. I felt I was in love, too... :) Full lyrics here.
Just one glance took away my breath
Then you drew me in with your tenderness
You captivate my soul, I'm enraptured
You knocked me out and you locked me up
Stole my heart like a thief at love
Keep me here in your happy ever after
I'm captured |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/16/2009 11:52:00 PM |
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| Wednesday, March 11, 2009 |
| Tara na, Biyahe tayo! |
Borrowed from Donna. That's her favorite tagline. Hehe.
Can't wait, can't wait... Ilocos-Pagudpod trip. Marinduque Holy Week.
Boracay? No tentative dates yet.
Summer fun! Summer lovin' (haha goodluck!) |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/11/2009 10:24:00 PM |
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| Sunday, March 08, 2009 |
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Gian and I had one of the many role-playing games again, tee-hee! Super funny!
G: mama, what's wrong?
me: I'm sad *fakes a frown*
G: Mim, something's wrong with mama! *kisses me*
G: mama, happy! (read: he wants me to smile)
More reasons to smile... have 300 and slumdog millionaire on my iPod. Yipee!!! |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/08/2009 07:44:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, March 04, 2009 |
| Princess Mama! |
I went home carrying a bouquet of flowers (not for me tho), and when my Gian came up to me and said "Flowers!"
me: "is it nice?"
G: "it's nice!" *walks 2 steps then faces me again*
G: "Princess Mama!" *all smiles*
me: *heart melts as he 'super hugs' me*
that's my boy! i'm his world (toy trains and tv aside, lol) and he's definitely mine :) |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/04/2009 11:14:00 PM |
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| back read, back read... |
| Writing will always be the best therapy for me. And reading, too -- especially if it's your OWN writing. *hahaha* Not to mention entertaining.... *lol bitterness* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/04/2009 12:41:00 AM |
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| Monday, March 02, 2009 |
| Gian's Blurbs |
Recent ramblings from surprisingly amazing son:
- "hmmm... that's strange..." (with matching kamot sa ulo)
- "that's tricky!"
- "please mama, get my books back"
- "mama, that's terrible!"
- "mama, surprise me!" (when he wants me to get him something nice: toys, crayons, tic tac, etc.)
- "turn to...." (pooh, tigger, snake, etc etc! we both love role-playing games haha!)
- "plenty kisses, mama" (then he'd kiss me in succession)
- "underpants!" (he refers to his shorts as underpants! nosebleed haha)
What would i do without my GiAN?! You're my world, baby. No words are enough. *muah* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/02/2009 12:09:00 AM |
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| Sunday, March 01, 2009 |
| Eus and Ferdz, this one's for you. |
Tonight, I sowed the seeds of deep-seeded friendship, with Eus and Ferdz. Real, strongly-founded friendship. There were tears and laughter, and above all, we found a whole new, redefined meaning of friendship at its best (and worst). I love you both! Emo shit and all, I know we'd be there thru thick and thin, sadness and grace, deep shit and all. I also realized that the people who said that "they'd be there for you whatever and however long it takes" are all empty promises, unless they are words coming from friends. Were there many typos? Will post the pics soon why (if ever). Basta, I love you both! Keep the faith.
xoxo,
CBT
"Until one morning, I'll wake up and find I'm thinking about something else, and then I'll know the worst is over.. My heart might be bruised, but it will recover and become capable of seeing the beauty of life once more... It happened before, it will happen again, I'm sure. When someone leaves, it's because someone is about to arrive - I'll find love again." |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 3/01/2009 02:26:00 AM |
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| Thursday, February 26, 2009 |
| Quotes, quotes, quotes. Mostly sad, though. |
Someone asked me if I knew him. A million memories flashed through my mind then I whispered.. “No, not anymore…”
“Alam mo ba kung gaano kalayo ang pagitan ng dalawang tao pag nagtalikuran na sila? Kailangan mong libutin ang buong mundo para lang makaharap muli ang taong tinalikuran mo.” - Bob Ong
Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.
“If two people are meant for each other, it doesn't mean that they are meant for each other NOW...” –- Pacey, Dawson’s Creek
Sometimes, the people who are afraid of having a commitment are the persons who know the real meaning of it
A fall from the 3rd floor hurts as much as a fall from the 100th.
Lesson: Give it all. It'll hurt just the same.
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/26/2009 11:29:00 PM |
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| Tuesday, February 24, 2009 |
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In one episode of South Park, Stan found his friend Butters, who just had his heart broken, sitting on a rain-soaked curb in tears.
Butters: "Uh, well yeah, I'm sad, but at the same time, I'm really happy that something could make me feel this sad. It's like, it makes me feel alive, you know? It makes me feel human. The only way I can feel this sad now is I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good... so I guess what I'm feeling is like a beautiful sadness..."
*awww* |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/24/2009 11:29:00 PM |
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| Saturday, February 21, 2009 |
| 50 Hurting Experience from Loving |
how many of these would you tick? i'm sure nobody would score 50/50! btw, i got this from someone's bulletin, hehe. here goes:
1. Letting go of a person you've just learned to love.
2. Reminiscing the good times you shared together.
3. Shielding your heart to love somebody.
4. Trying to hide what you really feel.
5. Trying to hide the tears that involuntarily fall from your eyes.
6. Loving a person too much.
7. Giving up someone you never thought of giving up.
8. Having the right love at the wrong time.
9. Taking the risk to fall in love again.
10. Hiding your relationship from someone else.
11. Controlling your feelings to avoid hurting a friend.
12. Thinking of him/her every waking and sleeping moment knowing all the while that he/she never even thinks a single thought of you.
13. Letting go, because everytime you see the person, you only fall deeper.
14. Holding back only to find out when it's too late, you both felt the same way, but were only scared to lose each other so much that you didn't let the feelings out.
15. Falling in love with someone you didn't mean to fall in love with.
16. Finding the perfect guy/girl...with only one problem- he/she doesn't love you...the way you want him/her to.
17. Helping the one you love "court" your friend / helping your friend "court" the one you love.
18. Seeing the one you love crying for someone else.
19. Waiting also hurts like hell.
20. Having to hear "... I've met someone"
21. Agreeing to his/her wish to 'just be friends'.
22. Asking his/her freedom back bcoz 'he'd/she'd be happier with him/her'.
23. Asking you to 'forget that everything happened' and be 'normal' friends again.
24. Hearing that you're treated as a little bro/sis (ouch!).
25. Sharing his/her future plans for the guy/girl with you.
26. You stopped being friends bcoz his gf/her bf asked him/her to.
27. Being denied in front of people.
28. Telling you lies where he'd/she'd been when actually, he/she was with a 'new friend' or an 'old flame' (whew!).
29. He/she told you he'd/she'd be leaving you to return to his/her ex? the one he/she left for you!
30. Breaking someone's heart.
31. Fighting for that one thing that would make you happy that is, holding on to a person who can not guarantee you is/her commitment unless he/she fix himself/herself. ..then, you are left hanging for the moment...then he/she says, time will tell... ang labo lang niya...but you still decided to hope in him/her and trust him/her.
32. Pretending you're OK when inside you're dying.
33. Pretending to be strong.... and recognizing your weakness.
34. Lying in bed each night, thinking of that special person you can never have.
35. Being with someone you can't actually love.
36. Pretending you don't love a person whom you actually love.
37. Being in love.
38. Letting go even if you really don't want to...having no right to say you are hurting because it was your decision.
39. Seeing the person you love hurt because of you... and not being able to help that person.
40. Having the courage to say "I LOVE YOU" to the person you love and finding out afterwards that things will never be the same again when he/she doesn't treat you with the same closeness as before.
41. Having to face the fact that someone is capable of completely destroying the wall that you have set for yourself, leaving you weak and vulnerable.
42. Admitting that you love someone despite his/her imperfections.
43. Finding out that the more you try to hate him/her, the more you end up loving him/her, perhaps even more than before.
44. Realizing how stupid your mistakes were that led to your break-up.
45. The thought that this guy/girl, used to really love you and you loved him/her as well but you didn't give enough and he/she gave up on you.
46. Sharing the one you love with SOMEBODY else....."
47. Making a promise....and realizing that when the time has come for that promise to be delivered... the commitment is no longer there.
48. Violating your parents' rules for that someone that you love.
49. Leaving your long-time friends because the one you love cannot accept them.
50. The hardest thing about love - believing it.
how did i do? i'll post it later, maybe.
okay, those are the cons. it's sad if you got the perfect score (how ironic!), but at the end of the day, after all the burns, bruises and battle scars, there are more than a million reasons why we SHOULD still believe in love... *^_^*
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/21/2009 11:22:00 AM |
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| On Moving On... |
"how do you move on?
.... you move on when your heart finally understands that there is no turning back"
i just got this from someone's YM status message. awww.... ouch. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/21/2009 04:46:00 AM |
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| Monday, February 16, 2009 |
| Hold On My Heart |
hold on my heart
just hold on to that feeling
we both know we've been here before
we both know what can happen
hold on my heart
don't let him see you're crying
no matter where I go
he'll always be with me |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/16/2009 12:00:00 AM |
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| Sunday, February 15, 2009 |
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I remembered this quote which became my favorite from the first time I've read it during my high school days...
"Don't come close if later you'll just pass by, don't smile if later you'll just let me cry, don't touch me if later you'll just walk away, don't love me if later you'll just leave me and won't stay."
I must have said this to everyone whom I've come across. EVERYONE.
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| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 2/15/2009 11:38:00 PM |
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| Wednesday, January 28, 2009 |
| Random Thoughts, etc. |
Blah-blahs and more blah-blahs.- Currently addicted to "No Air" by Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown. Been going on for week now (I know, late bloomer!)
- More addictions: hot chocolate and Cornetto (had it 4/6 days)
- Swamped with work. (Ugghh... do i still have to talk about this here?!)
- People come, people go. But I guess lately, most people that I've become very close with are not too close anymore. I miss Mikko, Rey, Rox, Joyce... soon there will be more. It's really really really really sad... *SIGH*
- The mind is willing, but the heart is weak.
- Where the hell did Molly and James go?! They are Gian's toy trains. It really bothers me that I suddenly can't find them! Arggh!
- Hey you! Yes you, JP! You got the job! I'm really happy for you!
- In relation to ^ .... Thank you Lord! It's amazing how you really listen to prayers :)
- Looking forward to Pagudpod trip
I hope there will be more good things to look forward to. ***NO AIR!!!*** |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 1/28/2009 12:34:00 AM |
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| Sunday, January 04, 2009 |
| CAPRICORN: Year 2009 Overview |
In order for Capricorn to accomplish their goals in 2009, intelligent brainstorming is a must. Connecting with others satisfies your mind, and friends are a source of stimulation and inspiration, adding to the scientific developments you like to explore. That said, be sure to take time for yourself. You don't have to master everything in a day.
You thrive on making new discoveries and developing opportunities. Call upon your inner guidance to help get the job done more efficiently. If you feel any uncertainty, other people are there to confirm your ideas, and allowing yourself to explore your inner thoughts will help you align yourself with a greater sense of awareness and meaningfulness.
Capricorn rarely shies away from highly concentrated work, and you are able to meet challenges as they come up in 2009. This is a time of great self-discovery and transformation for you. As you work to manifest your best possible self, you will see things from a deeper perspective than ever before. Hidden beneath your desire to work hard is the key to making your life easier. In other words, you won't have to strain as much if you surrender to a higher knowing. Using your powers of concentration to tune into universal knowledge will help you manifest your highest dreams. |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 1/04/2009 01:59:00 AM |
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| Thursday, December 25, 2008 |
| Merry Christmas!!! |
My Gian never fails to amaze me. I was surprised how he was able to carry a crowd (a bunch of kids older than him) by doing some of his antics and non-stop blurbs. He's a real charmer. He made them laugh, and they were amused because he's still very young (even the parents of the kids were watching him, he was quite entertaining, really!). He also made them speak in English (they were locals)! They were imitating how he spoke, which I know they found really cute because I heard them say so. When they said their goodbyes after the Mass, they told Gian, "Tawa ka!" Gian did not react, I don't think he understood. Or maybe he was still processing what they meant. So I told Gian, "Gian, you laugh daw!" And so he did (kailangan English eh no?!). Goodbyes and all, Gian even told them, "Text text!"
A very merry Christmas to Gian! He got a lot of Thomas Train presents! He slept with all of them beside him. I'm pretty sure that he'll wake up in the middle of the night just to check if the attendance is still complete. I'm sure to be scolded by him if he doesn't find them.
Thanks Ninang for Percy, Thomas and Emily, and James. 3 Thomas Train presents for Christmas! Unico hijo daw nya, walang kokontra! Thanks Ninang Kay for Gordon, and Tito JP for Percy, too. When Mamita arrives, 2 more trains will come! My Gian couldn't have asked for more :) |
| posted by *~bLuSh~* @ 12/25/2008 02:45:00 AM |
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| About Me |
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Name: *~bLuSh~*
Home: Manila, Philippines
About Me: I'm: VAIN, hyperactive, outgoing, stubborn, impulsive, critical, lazy, paranoid....
LOVES: music, dining, reading, sleeping, my iPod, perfumes, cyberspace, bags, going out, pictures, GOD-family-friends *^_^*
See my complete profile
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